There are lots of reasons that a relationship might not be working out. The biggest complaint that people in long-term relationships have is that they get stuck in a boring routine and get comfortable with the same person, but they do not want to be alone. They would rather be in a relationship with someone who does not make them happy than be single. This is not a good reason to stay in a relationship. Society puts a lot of pressure on people to be in relationships and not be single. Hearing people tell you how much dating sucks and how lonely being single is makes them want to stay in a bad relationship.
If you want to want to know if you are in the wrong relationship, there are a few warning signs that you can spot like being unhappy or conflicted, being shut down and criticized by your partner, having no sex life, and feeling not like yourself. All these signs point that your relationship is not working out and that ending it is a better option than staying with someone who makes you unhappy. To know if you are in the wrong relationship, you need to sit down and ask yourself questions to get to the heart of your feelings. If you want to stay in your relationship, then this can also work to help you figure out what is going wrong and if it is fixable.
Just because a relationship did not work out, does not mean that you and your partner are bad people or that you did not try hard enough. It just means that you had different expectations and values that could not be compromised. Compromising too much especially on things that you value or feel strongly about, does not help either of you. A compromise should make both people happy and when one person is always giving in, this makes it very one-sided and unfairly changes the power dynamic. Too much compromise or unfair compromises is a sign that you are in the wrong relationship.
Are you feeling conflicted about your relationship or are having trouble thinking of you and your partner's future? This means that you have trouble seeing you and your partner in the long-term, or you feel hesitant to take the next step. For example, if you are having mixed feelings about marrying your partner or moving in together, this can be a sign that you are not happy. Take a few minutes and think about what is stopping you from taking the next step. Maybe you have some reservations about your partner in the long-term or maybe they have done things that made you uncomfortable and it is still bothering you. Yes, you can talk to your partner about your feelings and see if you can work it out, but that is not always the best solution. Sometimes you have to know when to call it quits and that requires a bit of self-reflection. Your emotions are valid and if you are feeling conflicted or upset in your relationship, they come from your gut instincts.
If you are asking yourself if you are in the wrong relationship, then you probably are. Relationships are not happy all the time, but if you are more unhappy then happy, then you should probably break up. It is true that happiness changes and there is nothing wrong with that. Feelings change and if that happens, there is no obligation to continue the relationship. Do not let the memories of how you felt at the beginning of the relationship make you feel guilty because you no longer feel the same way. Being in a relationship with someone who is unhappy or who makes you unhappy, is going to have long-term emotional effects on both people. Conflicts should be few and far between in your relationship.
The truth is opposites do not always attract. When people have opposing values, beliefs, and priorities, this shows in their relationship and will be the cause of many of their arguments and problems. In this situation, relationships become a never-ending argument and it lessens the pleasure that you get from being with your partner. Being constantly on defense from emotional attacks or criticism is exhausting. Nobody wants to spend their entire relationship yelling, screaming, and giving each other the cold shoulder. When your relationship becomes more conflicting than loving, it is a sign that you are in the wrong one and it is time to leave.
Another way to tell that you are in the wrong relationship is if your partner listens to you. Are you constantly being shut down when you bring up something or when you offer your opinion? Why you tell them that what they are saying is hurtful, do they dismiss it and say that it was just a joke? They are invalidating your feelings and opinions. Even if it is said in a joking way, it is still hurtful especially if it is repeated. A relationship should be equal where both partners can feel safe to share their ideas, feelings, and dreams without fear or censure. If you are afraid to tell your partner things or to offer an opinion because you know that they will shut you down, you are in the wrong relationship. When your partner shuts you down and criticizes you, they are showing that your feelings do not matter. No matter how it is said, it is always going to be hurtful. Constantly being criticized and having your opinions shut down makes you feel defensive and like a secondary partner in your relationship. This is not a good thing and is a sign that your relationship is no longer making you happy.
This type of relationship is one-sided. Dating sites and online dating services often talk about one person having to compromise to make their partner happy. This can give people the idea that giving in is a way to show your love and this type of thinking prioritizes self-sacrifice in your relationships. But when you push your wants and dreams aside for someone else, this builds resentment and makes you feel like you do not matter. This also shifts the relationship dynamic so that one person has all the power and this often translates to controlling behavior. If your partner mocks you for wanting to start a new hobby or shoots down all your home improvement ideas and call it constructive criticism, then they are the wrong partner for you. This is not constructive criticism at all. Constructive criticism offers a solution or commentary that will improve something. If your partner is saying that your ideas or dreams are stupid and that you do not know anything, they are being hurtful.
Have you ever been in a situation where you just do not feel like yourself? It might show up as a general feeling of uneasiness or just a lack of joy with the things that you used to love. Maybe your partner said that the things that you love are childish or gets annoyed whenever you talk about it. Maybe it is just a general sense that you have to act a certain way around them that does not fit with your personality. This kind of constant criticism can have a negative impact on your self-esteem. This is a hard feeling to articulate which makes it more difficult to deal with. If you have a general sense of unhappiness with yourself or a feeling like you are witnessing your relationship from the outside, this is a warning sign that your relationship is not working out.
When a relationship is unbalanced, one person often becomes more controlling and aggressive. This is not always done consciously, but it does happen. For instance, your partner might tell you how to feel about a certain situation by invalidating your feelings and saying that you are over-reacting. This makes it easy for you to feel like you have to behave a certain way to make your partner happy or that you need to change yourself to fit into the relationship. Every single one of us does this to an extent when we are in a relationship and it does not usually have a negative effect but when it is much larger and frequent, it will become a problem and makes the relationship unfair. A relationship should make you a better person and bring out the best parts of you if you find yourself becoming a person that you do not recognize and do not like then it is time to move on.
When you bring up your feelings and concerns with your partner, they might either get defensive or even say that you are imagining things. This can make you feel guilty and is a form of emotional manipulation. Your partner is undermining and invalidating your feelings and then making you feel guilty for feeling that way. This is not the basis of a healthy relationship and can lead to depression, anxiety, and even some physical health problems. You should never stay in a relationship that is emotionally abusive or stay with a partner who is dismissive of your feelings.
When the sex becomes stale, you are in the wrong relationship. This has less to do about skill and more about emotional intimacy. When you are in a relationship with someone, you find them attractive and sex becomes a way for you to become closer. Yes, bad sex has been a relationship killer before, but it is not as simple as that. Bad sex can also be sex that leaves you unsatisfied or emotionally upset. This is not something that you want in an intimate situation. If you and your partner are sexually incompatible, then you are not suited to each other and should find someone who fits you both better. Ask yourself is your partner is sexually satisfying you and if they are not, you should consider moving on to someone who will.
Sex is not always perfect, but it is a part of creating intimacy in a relationship. When people have sex, it can deepen a connection that they already have. If you are avoiding spending alone time with them then you are in the wrong relationship. Do you find excuses not to have sex or be intimate with your partner? You are definitely not happy with your relationship and are no longer attracted to your partner. Sex is also a sign of trust and when you are in the wrong relationship, you will not be able to trust that person enough to be intimate with them. Sex can make you feel emotionally vulnerable and it can be very pleasurable when you are with someone that you trust. If you are not comfortable during sex, you will not enjoy yourself. Sex can also cause a lot of arguments between partners.
You might feel uncomfortable with your partner or uncomfortable with yourself and your body and this will have an effect on your sex life. Also experiencing depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem because of your relationship affects your sexual libido. If you are unhappy you will not feel sexual desire either. This is a warning sign that your relationship is not making you happy anymore and you need to move on. When you have made the decision to break up with your partner, use EasySex.com to help you get over the slump. It is one of the best dating sites for hot singles to start hookup dating and meeting tons of really sexy people.
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